It is hard as an atheist not to interject when hearing people proclaim their religious beliefs. This doesn’t offend me personally because I have empirical evidence to back up my version of reality, and someone else’s opinion doesn’t change that.  I often find my self feeling offended myself when I hear people who I believe to be otherwise brilliant people following what I consider odd superstitions and strange rituals.  These days I try hard to rein myself in and not make comments that I feel might upset religious folk because it is important to remember that EVERYONE has a right to believe the way they want to.

This doesn’t work most of the time though because as I try to check my own comments most religious folk don’t have such a verbal or mental filter.  They consider anyone that does not agree with their beliefs an affront to their beliefs.  I think atheism offends the religious because there is no empirical evidence to support their beliefs. Religious people rely on the fact that they are a part of a large and powerful group of people.  Having a such a group of people who agree with them supports their viewpoint, even if that viewpoints has no logical or empirical support.

When an atheist simply proclaims his or her point of view, it erodes the perception that everybody is in agreement about god, and thus constitutes a direct attack on the institution.

My point today is this.  Religious folk, we atheists are not out to get you.  We just don’t believe what you do.  All my atheist friends  out there need to stop viewing religious folk as inferior or stupid people.  It can be an intelligent choice to be a part of such a group, right or wrong.  We all need to remember that the right to believe the way we want to is why we can have blog posts like this on BOTH sides of the aisle.

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I will be the first to admit that I was never an upwardly mobile career oriented guy. I was, and am still pretty laid back in terms of my job and the whole career path thing. I was pretty content back then getting up each day and working my job without much care for the road my life would take. That’s not to say I did not have some plans for the future. My mind often wandered towards thinking about where I might be in 5 or ten years. I guess I was odd in the fact that I didn’t really party or hang out with the so-called fun crowd. I was also a late bloomer in that I wasn’t really interested in relationships with women. That’s not to say I didn’t have natural thoughts and desires but I just never actively pursued them. That’s why it was such a magical surprise that while doing my job I crossed paths with someone who piqued my interest at a very deep level.

When Laura and I met it was not love at first sight. On the contrary, it was more like a “do what I say and we will get along just fine” type of meeting. You see, we both worked at opposite ends of the daily schedule and as anyone that has worked in a restaurant environment can tell you, that amounts to almost two totally different jobs. They were similar, but altogether VERY different as well. I was making the transition from my time zone, nights, to her time zone, early mornings. This meant I was sort of invading her space. She was comfortable and commanded quite a bit of respect because of her knowledge of the job and skills at doing it. I was the new egg. That’s why I did my best to defer to her as I worked to get used to my new duties.

She was pleasant and fun to work with but she was older than I was and I was not much of a dating guy so it was a real surprise when she asked me if I wanted to go have dinner. She was wickedly smart and funny and I wanted to get to know her better so I accepted. Once again in a non-fairy-tale way, I can’t say we had everything in common. In fact, we were on opposite ends of the spectrum in terms of movies we liked, activities we enjoyed, politics, and money matters and so on. We did have a lot in common in terms of our beliefs about religion, life and family and what it means to come from distressed homes. We both had similar uneasy childhoods so we shared that. Most importantly she has a huge heart and is a

 wonderful mother. She brought a sparkle into my life that it is tough to describe. Her son Adam was a joy and being with them made me feel whole in a way I had not felt before. I fell for her and as the cliché’ goes, the rest is history.

All relationships suffer from high and low points. We have had our share. We are still together today 18 years later. She has given me support, nurturing, love attention and three beautiful children and not the least of which 18 years of her life that I can never thank her enough for. I am not the man I was 18 years ago. I am who I am today largely in part to her patience, understanding, love and guidance. I have never met anyone like her before and I am very happy to say, never since. She is my world, my universe, my rock and my love all rolled into one. She is everything to me.

Honey, when you read this know that I look forward to spending another 18 and more years with you. I have always tried to be a good man, father and husband. I could not do it without you. I love you more than words can express and am forever glad and grateful that you came into my life 18 years ago today. Happy anniversary darling.

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The tenants of Solipsism postulate that MY experiences are the ONLY provable experiences.  When you speak about pain, such as, you cannot really speak accurately about someone else’s pain but only your own.  It also implies that you cannot really ever describe your pain to another person since it is uniquely yours and anyone trying to interpret your description can only do so using analogs in their own mind from their own experiences.  Deep shit right?

Well, I had a situation that was uniquely painful that I want to share with you.  I have a nice laptop from a major computer maker that I am sure you are all familiar with.  lets just say they had a catchy ad campaign a while back where a jerky teen went around pointing out that folks were “gettin’ a (insert manufacturer here)”.  This laptop is small and portable like most laptops are and had been a fun, useful machine for me for a long while now.  Suddenly the last few weeks it gradually has been harder and harder to power on.  Some thorough testing and research revealed to me that the coin cell, sometimes called the button cell battery that powers the BIOS was failing and needed to be replaced.  Much to my dismay, more research on the process of replacing the battery yielded a sobering answer.  I will have to tear t his damned machine UTTERLY apart to do the job.  I don’t just mean removing some parts and pieces I mean, the process involves taking the machine apart to the BARE METAL!

Not only is the battery positioned under 5 layers of other components but it is upside down on the bottom of the motherboard which must be removed to get to it.  I sat shocked and quietly crying for an hour while I mulled around in my mind what options I have.  The battery itself is a standard button type 2032 used in everything from hearing aids to remote controls.  That’s easy to get.  The process seemed very daunting.  I even went as far as asking my buddy Jim, who is a much more detail oriented guy than I am how much he would charge me to do the job.  He refused to quote me stating that’s what friends are for.  What a guy my buddy Jim is.

I bought the battery but just could not bring myself to take the machine over to Jim’s shop.  I felt half guilty at sticking him with such an inane job and one half stupefied at my reluctance to do it myself.  A week went by and I cam home early today for the long weekend and decided I would not let this job scare me.  So I started about 3:00 PM.  It was not as hard as i thought it would be, just tedious.  I had a collection of small quarter sized, plastic ice cream container lids to put all the sundry screws in.  Thanks to my honey who saved them just for situations such as this.  I grabbed some small post it notes and a set of jewelers screwdrivers and set to work.

About 4:45 the job was done.  It was time to test the machine.  Would it boot?  I can happily say that this post was done entirely on that little laptop as a burn in test.  HOWEVER…

I would not wish that experience on anyone. Sophists say, you can’t really understand unless you have done it anyway.

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Throughout the course of my life I have met some extremely colorful characters.  I have a large circle of people who I am happy to call friends.  I have a lot of clients that I work for that I don’t really consider friends.  I want to tell you about a couple that fall into the former group.

These folks originally joined my group of acquaintances by becoming customers of mine. I was approached to update their existing business website, MagnetQueen.  It was a long process as their website was a bit larger than I anticipated.  Long jobs, as any developer or graphic designer will tell you, tend to stick with you.  This one introduced me to Brian and Liza,  Native New Yorker’s that migrated their business here to Tennessee.  They make Save the Date Magnets for weddings, birthdays, graduations, you name it.

Brian is a Fordham University graduate and Liza is a graduate of the Parsons School of Design.  Together they have owned and run their own successful business for many, many years.  They would tell you that they wish they could be a lot more successful but, what other person wouldn’t  tell you the same?   They are a fun couple that likes the arts and are superb conversationalist and over the years I have grown very fond of them.  Most importantly they make some of the coolest magnets you can imagine.  My refrigerator is covered with picture magnets and fun magnets they have made for me over the years.

If you are in the market for some unique invites to give for your next event.  I hope you will consider my friend’s work.  I think you will be very pleased. 

Here’s to you Brian and Liza.

http://www.magnetqueen.com

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    This made me wonder what it would have been like at the funeral of a comedian.  I bet the jokes flow and the good memories make the whole room howl with laughter.  With that being said here is a list of my favorite comedians that have shuffled off their mortal coil.  I hope you enjoy some good memories and laughs thinking of these folks and the joy they brought to the world.  I know I did.

12►

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   I often work on peoples computers. I do it for fun. I do it to make connections with people.  I do it because there is a need.  I lost count long ago of how many friends I have made with this philosophy.  Most of the time I get paid in the end by having improved my friendships or making connections that lead to other paying jobs.  I don’t look at it as work. I look at it as a way to share with folks and get to know people.

    Well, tonight I had the distinct pleasure of getting to know one of my coworkers and her family better while taking care of a little computer issue they had.  Not sure I helped much, just checked the main components, vid card, memory, power supply, you know.  Luckily it wasn’t anything major.  Few component reseats and a bios reset and viola, a booting PC.

    What made the night super special was that payment I mentioned.  I had AMAZING Thai food cooked in a real, as they put it, “working kitchen” by my friend’s husband.  I have had Thai before but after this meal I would like to say I have NEVER had Thai until tonight.  Thai beer, Green Curry with Beef, Lemon grass Shrimp soup with Thai chilies, read that as super HOT, and fresh fried rice with chicken.  I loved every bite.  I loved the company and conversation.  I don’t write about every meal but I felt like this one was worth noting. 

    So here’s to Lisa and Rick who treated me like family just for helping them with a computer problem. Thanks guys!

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