10. Their small size makes them portable 09. Elves, the other, other white meat 08. Can conveniently use UPS for elf travel 07. OSHA doesn’t care how many elves you kill 06. Keeps him from ever having to buy knee pads 05. Has a deal with Nabisco to pick up Keebler lay-offs 04. Saves money by shopping in the kids section 03. 20 elves produce as much heat as one rick of wood. 02. Elves have to be at least 300 years old to retire. 01....
Read MoreMy Life Story, or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Myself.
The holiday season is always a double edged sword for me. I am sure I am not alone in what I am about to discuss, but at this time of year I sure feel like I am. No, this is not about my belief system, even though this time of year most definitely brings them to the forefront of my conversations and thoughts.Today I would like to share with anyone reading this how my family celebrates the holidays. Its part of who I am and I thought it...
Read MoreI THINK SANTA CLAUS IS A WOMAN
I hate to be the one to defy sacred myth, but I believe he’s actually a SHE. Think about it. Christmas is a big, organized, warm, fuzzy, nurturing social deal, and I have a tough time believing a guy could possibly pull it all off! For starters, a lot of men don’t even think about selecting gifts until Christmas Eve. It’s as if they are all frozen in some kind of Ebenezerian Time Warp until 3 p.m. on Dec. 24th, when they...
Read MoreWhy Phone Technical Support is so bad these days
For those of you that don’t know me or have not yet read my bio page, I do phone support for a software company. This post is going to be one sided but not the way you might think. Let me start by saying that an individual person by and large is a smart animal. The human animal possesses the potential for great compassion, great understanding, great learning, great skills. We can send a man to the moon. We can land rovers on...
Read MoreAtheisim for the Holidays
It always amazes me the sheer number of theists that wander around all their lives oblivious to the fact that there are those of us that do not believe in gods. During the holidays this becomes especially noticeable. The question of where, when, how, or even IF a person should reveal their disbelief in gods is one which I find very important even apart from the issue of holidays and ritual celebrations. Most of the time, a person can go...
Read MoreTop 10 xmas gifts I won’t get in 2008.
When you have a family, the holidays usually end up being all about your children, family and friends more so than yourself. I believe thats the way it really should be. Although I don’t really enjoy torturing myself, I do like to force myself to realize that there are differences between what one wants and what one needs. This all adds up to my usual mental list of the things I really WANT as opposed to what i will probably...
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